Hotel La Quinta by Wyndham Temecula (Temecula, USA)

It may seem a little pricey at the outset, but essential ‘freebies' include parking, breakfast and-these days-WiFi.

Close by are the old town of Temecula and a popular shopping mall. Pachenga and the casinos are also within easy reach, as are seemingly countless wineries in this Californian wine producing haven. For the more energetic, possibilities include the vintage motocross races at Cahuilla Creek MX Park in Anza.

Beds are a delight and really comfortable. Service is outstanding throughout and extends to the pet rest area which is spotlessly clean and well stocked.

The hotel may not be full by any means, but the car park is! If they state ‘free parking', there should at least be some adequate provision. Coffee in the room is OK but that served with breakfast isn't. Solution: have coffee in the room, before you venture in to breakfast.

Wasn't it Quentin Crisp who said that, after 3 years, accumulations of dust didn't increase? The policy seems to have been embraced and extended here. Furniture looks as if it has never been dusted and beds have never been moved for cleaning the surrounds. Further tell-tale signs include mildew on the shower curtain and ants frolicking in the bathroom.

There's no coffee for the coffee maker. Request some and it's out of stock. Similarly, ask for ‘proper' bath towels and they are currently (*and constantly) being dried. Room maintenance and cleaning is below acceptable levels and the only ‘joke' is the breakfast which is accompanied by disgusting coffee.